would you prefer a bear which cost 500 bucks ,
or a bear which cost 500 hours to make it .
would you rather be happy by the lies ,
or to be hurt by the truth .
would you rather to love someone whom you love more ,
or loves someone who loves you more ?

would you ?
define love , romance .
is all about trust after all .
it become kinship soemday too .
hate your mother , it mean you hate your wife .
same la same la .
damn bodoh .

alright man .

had tuition in the morning .
gosh .
walked to tmart with the handsome guy .
valerie jealous uh ?
haha .
he damn cute lahs .
very blur yet funny .
hahhaha .
XD

oh yea .
went to japanese school carnival .
was fun .
eat and dance together .
girls in kimono are hot uh .
damn .
but jap guy just not my type .
hahah .
i love the dance .
though i looked like an idiot ,
but i did had fun .
HAHA XD

oh .
the jap babies are damn cute .
is fucking cute .
56 more days to o's amaths paper 1 .
GOGOGO !
i can do it .
and and , fuck cbp .
she took away the answer key for my pure geo tys .
and doing tys without answer key SUCK BIG TIME .
fuck it la .
damn pussy .
i got to search the net for answers ,
and i had got many different answers
damn it .

alright .
loves .
xoxoxo .

ratatouille dinner affair .

damn it .
this show damn nice .
seriously worth watching .
gosh gosh .

today friday uh .
didn't had enough sleep .
so was damn irritating the whole day .
oh , what i meant was ,
i being irritating the whole ,
irritating others , making them irritated .
HAHA .
that what i do best uh .
:D

having tuition tomorrow ,
and visiting japanese school too .
damn it .
so cant wait
(:

oh loves .
forgive and forsake the past ,
to move on to achieve .
let's not take things ,
but we make things .

oh dread .
tired .
nightnight (:

Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you'll never know me
Every day It's as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
I am now In a world where I Have to hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow I will show the world
What's inside my heart
And be loved for who I am
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection Someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show Who I am inside?
There's a heart that must be Free to fly
That burns with a need to know
The reason why
Why must we all conceal What we think, how we feel?
Must there be a secret in me I'm forced to hide?
I won't pretend that I'm Someone else for all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

how about you ?
are you showing who you are inside ?
sigh .

FUCK !
didn't know why in the world i choose to go to school today ?!
argh .
damn it .
emergency exercise .
was in the field the whole morning .
T.T

science on fire , like as if block A will be on fire .
and if science block really caught fire ,
why dumped us in the field , where no teachers are around ?
feel so like ...
__

not a very good day today .
but it makes me laugh out loud .
uh ?
!@#$%^&

had a friendly match with 3a1 in the morning .
was a fun one .
the boy's match was damn hiong .
but damn nice .
3cheers to 4e1 boy .
:D

fuck it .
pe was fun today .
damn hyper .
was screaming away .
gosh .
my stomach hurts like FUCK .
cause of the tremendous hit from yoges .
haha .
i dash and bump onto her .
quite funny man .
alright , but my stomach hurts okay .
and it still hurts now .
ARGH .
damn it la dey .

yesterday vomited in the morning .
god damn it .
damn gross .
i think there is something wrong with my stomach system man .
see how .
if it continues , then ...
gg uh .

had to pay for my chinese o's paper again .
is super damn it .
AHHHHHHH .
T.T

you would make it big being a giggolo .
seriously .
HAHA .
XD
go study la dickhead .
job ? too young .
be practical .
a laughing stock man .
remember how i used to laugh at chao bengs ?
ya , you're now one .
being mocked at .
so embarassing .
wake up la dey .

was a fruitful and happening weekends for me .
damn tiring too .
friday went to order my contact lense ,
and had a free daily one ,
to try on .
after that went down to simei .
reached home around 1.30 .
was dead tired .
had to wake up at 9 the next morning for tuition .
after that ,
WOOT . went marina bay for fireworks !
was damn nice .
goshhhh .
the view was damn beautiful .
how i wish ...
hahs , is a wish .
reached home ,
on the phone till like 5.30 next morning .
ARGH !
damn damn tired .

sunday , did practically nothing ,
but sleeping .
T.T
wanted to study but ,
couldn't really resist myself to the temptation of my bed .
HAHA .
so yep , slept all the way (:

monday was soso .
kinda of hyper .
did 280 of bio mcq-s ,
after school .
such great achivements .
:D

how would you make use of the liberty given to you ?
of course , unlimited ways of using .
humans are greedy ,
when there is greed ,
there is no love ,
no nothing .
there's only unlimited desires .
i'm sorry kid ,
you're too young for freedom ,
and look at the way you're using it .
you're abusing it .
is not too late to realise ,
and come back now .
is never close .
i'll be there for you , these 5 words i swear to you . (:
then again , to you , i am just a fool .
even though i still trust you .
hope you didn't do anything dumb again .
XD
blessings .

rest for the whole day .
feeling pretty good .
but my head weighs like an elephant's ass .
so heavy uh .
never felt so dizzy in my life before .
my head like lack of oxygen or blood ,
something like that .
HAHA .

damn it la sio .
the taste of the medicine fills my mouth .
taste so yucky .
and i didn't even take cough syrup lohs ,
i think is the pills .
argh .
medicines just suck big time .
T.T

sudden thoughts of o's came to my mind .
and i was kind of freak off by it .
66 days to o's lei .
and and 13 days to prelims .
gosh la .
but kind of happy too .
the thought of gettin out of this school ,
but i will miss so much things .
my friend , teacher and band .
ARGH .

nehmind , good things always come to an end right ?
hee .
i feeling so scared for my exams .
so so scaredddddddd .
i had never feel such anxiety in my life before .
hahaha .
damn it la .
i wana score man !
i wana ACED every subject ,
okay lahs , maybe not physic .
HAHA
physic is serious fuck .
but i think i understand it .

life's soooooo contradicting ,
or perhaps , i am contradicting myself .
well .
fate .

oh gosh .

the taste of the medicine in my mouth ,
sucks like totally .
and i didn't even swallow the god damn cough syrup ,
i spit it out ,
but still cannot make it !
ARGHHH
!@@#%^&*

damn it la sio .

i feel so weak ,
never felt like this before ,
like lack of energy .
damn it la .
why did i actually allow my health to detoriate till this extent ?
dumb of me , really i was .

the day after i was born and the day before i die ,
everything will be control by me .
no one is to blame for anything that happened ,
whoever the victim is .
our mind soul body belongs to us ,
we made that decision .

is my own life ,
i can't ruin it .
i have to make things happen in life .
i got to stay strong .
nobody knows what will happen after that ,
but we can make it happen .
i will .

though i don't know if you're refering to me not ,
i will take it as a yes .
to make myself feel better .
i think i did .
if those xiao meimei you are refering to .
then HOHO .
limbei is speechless la bang .
i need you badly right now ,
but you ain't .

oh .
o's english oral .
first time in my life feeling that nervous .
argh .
hope i really do well .
but i speak like a fucktard .
serious man .
damn it la sio .
er a distiction pleaseeeee .
i really wana do well ,
duh , like who don't ?
HAHA .
(:

oh . i am burning hot .
38.3 .
fuck it .
i felt so sick uh .
so tired .
my whole body is breaking into pieces .
seriously .

i pity the world .
everyone is changing .
what has the society coming to ?
or am i just too , sensitive ?
hahs .
i don't know either .

my head is breaking .
my spine is breaking .
i can't take it ...

my result sucks .

i ain't feeling anything .
no anger , no sadness
not even a bit of regret .
i don't know why .

i should be crying and ashame for such result .
but , i ain't feeling anything .
it's so screwed up .
feeling fucking terrible inside .
why must such things happened to me ,
during o's year ?
can't you do that after that ?

fucking ccb .
i am a cgdcb man .
serious .

define the word - pain .
it no longer contain any meaning to me .

shag .
monday tommorrow , screams .
didn't feel like going out today .
so spent my time sleeping .
and was out in the afternoon .
well well .
nothing much .

oh , so feel like going to the park .
next saturdayyyyyyyyyy .
loves .
i feel like running around .
beats me either ,
just a feeling to .

having damn random thoughts .
nehmind .

DAMN IT LA SIO ,
english oral tommorrow .
oh yes , wish me lucks .
think so gonna screw up the picture section .
AH .
hope my tester is a GCB .
lalala .
(:

woo , a chinese result releasing tommorrow ?
damn it la sio .
so nervous .

why did my trust turns out to be betray everytime ?
each time , i get so hurt .
even though i was the good party .
so is fate playing with me ?
or telling me , not to be a good person .
i have to learn it too .
i am gonna own the world .
and everybody .

being retarded , acting stupid ,
pretending you don't know anything ,
doesn't bring you anywhere ,
is not a blessing .
look at the pathetic state now ,
you lost everything true .
so much of a "ignorance is bliss uh"

i asked : forever ?
you said : yes forever .
it seems like your forever is 9 months .
everything ends here .
after 2 months of struggle , i am going to own .
lets get HIGH .
everything is gone for good .
it is .

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY !
lala .
((:

oh yea .
bought my dress .
so happy (:
studied with valerie lim zhiyou today .
woo .
fun and nice and and fruitful ((:

alright . nothing more .
i love this song ((:
to the gentlemen there ?
loves .

I guess this time you're really leaving
I heard your suitcase say goodbye
Well as my broken heart lies bleeding
You say true love is suicide
You say you've cried a thousand rivers
And now you're swimming for the shore
You left me drowning in my tears
And you won't save me anymore
I'm praying to God
you'll give me one more chance girl

I'll be there for you,
these five words I swear to you
When you breathe,
I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you I know
you know we've had some good times
Now they have their own hiding place
Well I can promise you tomorrow
But I can't buy back yesterday
And baby you know my hands are dirty
But I wanted to be your Valentine
I'll be the water when you get thirsty baby
When you get drunk,I'll be the wine
I'll be there for you,
these five words I swear to you
When you breathe I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you
I wasn't there when you were happy
And I wasn't there when you were down
Didn't mean to miss your birthday baby
I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out
I'll be there for you,
these five words I swear to you
When you breathe I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do I'll be there for ...
I'll be there for you,
these five words I swear to you
When you breathe I wanna be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you ...

i'll swear i will . <3

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY !
lalala .

i skipped tuesday's lesson .
stayed at home instead .
the construction was killing me !!
haha .
met up with grace ,
did amaths paper .
a few sums .
and chatted with my beloved JUNIORS .
hahah .
damn cute uh they .
after that watched alone with a gang of people .
XD
really alot uh .
haha .
the show was soso . not very scary .
HAHA
leong is a timid idiot !
hahahahah .

today celebration .
SO HIGH UH !
thanks to me .
no shiyun no fun ,
no fun can die .
SO , loyang thanks me !
HAHAH .
was getting tired after that ,
no energy uh .
so abit low .

HAHA .

col performance is =.=
haha . sat with derek goh .
so funny uh .
had fun , cause out conversation was funny .
LAL .

having so many things on .
i am very busy you know ?
got no time for other ching cheng cheng thingy .
HAHAH .

my love will bring you home .
someday .
(:

I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All i wanna do is grow old with you
I'll get your medicine when your tummy aches
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks
Oh it could be so nice, growing old with you
I'll miss youI
'll kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold
I'll need you
I'll feed you
Even let ya hold the remote control
So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed if you've had too much to drink
I could be the girl who grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you

nice eh the lyrics .
the song even better .
hah .
oh i am feeling better .
that post was totally random .
cause i just miss you so badly .

oh yea !!!
i got my happy meal spoonge bob key chain .
HAHA .
so cute la sio .

amaths test was soso .
i think la .
perhaps a few careless .
SAD .
T.T
alright . nehmind .
practise more .
:D

humans are so superficial ain't they ?
i had been persueing for meaning and feeling in life .
i used to persue things which are ,
more spiritual , for the meaning of it .
but now , no longer .
i am persueing different things now .
i want things which can make me happy and statisfied ,
no longer want things that only contain meaning .
those thing are real happiness ,
but is difficult to feel it .
i no longer has the ability to feel the real happiness .
i threw that ability somewhere .
now i want superficial happiness .
i used to think guys who can give me feelings are precious ,
now , guys who can give me money are more precious .
i don't give a fuck care .
i can't find myself anymore .
i am lost out there .
i want to be the superficial lot .
maybe one day , i will find my meaning back .
my heart no longer has feeling ,
no longer has emotions . i only want to be happy ,
and nothing else concern me at all .
but why am i still bleeding ?
i choose fake happiness ,
that's the only way .
find me back please .
i hate myself for being like that ,
but i got no choice to .
so long i can stay happy , nothing else matter .
just let me stay "HAPPY" for these moments .
i will find my way back someday .
i hope so ,
and i hope , i will bring someone along with me too ,
back to the old you and me .
i feel so fake .
i am disgusted by myself somehow .


but for now ,
CHEERIOS !
laugh and smile whole heartedly .
YEA !
:D

monday tommorrow .
shag .
amaths test ,
and english summary .
more shag .
nono .
i am so excited for tommorow amaths test .
i don't know why too .
HAHAHAHAH .

okay ,
getting super high these few days .
saturday tuition ,
handsome guy wasn't there .
HAHA .
abit sad sio .
lalalal .

went vivo .
which idiot , actually invented heels to kill lady ?
HAHA .
no la .
is because i am lousy .
HAHA . okay .
no more heels from now on .
smart alec la .
go shopping wear heels .
stupid ass .
now my foot and the ankle there ,
damn pain .
T.T
bought a top .
and spend alot on eating .
T.T

saw the dress i wanted ,
but it cost 90 bucks ,
should i buy ?
maybe i will .
well , see how la .
damn it la sio .
i am in need of money .
damn it .
i hope one day ,
i walk and walk and walk ,
AND !
i will find som money on the floor .
500 bucks will do .
i not that greedy
XD

went to study amaths at whitesand today .
ha .
cannot make it la .
but at least ,
i learnt my formulas .
and bought 3 pens .

V^2 = U^2 + 2as
V = U + AT
S = 1/2( U+ V)T
S = UT + AT^2

YES AH !

alright .
cheerios .
wish me luck for tommorrow .
LOVES .

eveyday , i seek for your safety .
hope you're doing fine (:
don't feel stress up ,
you'll be alright .
everything will be fine someday .
loves . (:

friday ?

hahs . well nothing much .
fun was after school .
had basketball ?
yep ,
my game , my rule .
HAHA .
played psp and nsd .
i own la .
HAHA !
XD

heard the band .
GOOD OKAY .
hahha .
well , at least it sounds not bad without us .
(:
lysb GOGOGO !
lalalalal .

tuition tmlro !
hahahah .
excited .
want to do more amaths sums ,
and yep ,
the gosh handsome looking duman high guy !
HAHA .
:D

shag , didn't wet studying .
felt kinda sick .
and the others had something on too .
so ...
yep . didn't had the usual routine .
(:

the world is beautiful ,
the world loves me ,
and i love the world too .
you're beautiful ,
and i love you too .
so do you love me still ?
HAHA .
no la .
must be kdding right .
(:

okay .
thursday is the day i dread the most .
yet i am feeling damn hyper .
i don't why too .
like as if i was on some pills .
no ,
i want to be others estacsy ,
i want to make their day !
HEEHEE XD

i want to spead loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee .


okay .
leong is the limelight of today
HAHA .
yawning is disgusting !
hahah .
okay , maybe you can yawn in loyang ,
but aware of the volume .
HAHAH !
XD


i don't know why .
feel damn hyper this week .
i can practically jump around the whole day .
i don't know why too .

once i start walking ,
i don't feel like stopping .
i just want to keep walking and walking .
i don't even want to stop to wait for the lift ,
i don't even mind walking up the stairs of 9 floor .
i am just lazy to stop , i think .
i don't want to stop anymore .
i want to move on .
i don't know la sio ,

DAMN IT LA SIO .


i know why heart ache is the worst feeling of all .
normal muscle ache is hurtful enough ,
what's more the heart ,
which is the strongest muscle organ in our body ?
haha .
make sense right .
of course ,
seahshiyun lei dey .
no more ED .
not past tense .
is present tense , future tense .
everything will be so different now .


nothing gonna change my love for you .
but , i'll respect your decision .
i realise many things ,
i really do .
and you'll never be alone .
i'll be behind you .
GOGOGO !
:)

CHEERIOS .
love - xoxo .

assumptions lead to misunderstandings .
misunderstandings lead to quarrelings .
quarrelings lead to anger .
anger leads to sadness .
sadness leads to loneliness .
loneliness leads to regrets .

but by then you regret ,
you will realised everything has vanish ,
into the thin air .
before all these take place ,
why not stop assuming ,
and get answer ?
then everything will be avoided .

normally , people who assume ,
will be the one suffering at the end .
caused they will realise after that .
why didn't they just asked for an answer ,
since that was what they wanted all along ?
instead of assuming , and minsunderstanding people ,
and having high ego , get the answer first .
it just might be a better solution and move ,
rather than all this ,
isn't it ?

that's life , perhaps .
okay , damn random this post .
(:
loves .

there will be away out , for you .
stay strong .

i love pe and history today .
hahs .
pe was super high la ,
don't know why too .
hahah .
history watched a german movie .
i love the son - alexander ,
damn filial and thoughtful .
damn it la sio .
the message did manage to convey to me somehow ,
and what mr mohd said was true .
people is greedy ,
what's love when there's greed .
people is born greedy .
yes true .
agree to a far extent .

(:

prelims and o's on their way !
whoot .
can't wait .
after that will there are so manymany things to get done .
i need to start revising soon .
yea real soon ?
hah .

i want to grow old with you .
loves .